She was my first, we met online and gradually we trusted each other and we became real good friends we talked all day shared every detail we knew everything about each other. Then it evolved when it shouldn't have we became so attached and very quickly it became so intense and so intimate.
For reasons out of our control circumstances that we knew where there from the start we left each other, it was me i said we should end this, I said i couldn't do it though it's her that i want so deeply. I regret saying that i regret leaving her.
And now i see her and it seems she has moved on she's with someone else and i can't accept that i keep telling myself that's not real she loves me she is waiting for me. Yet it seems it is real and it is killing me. I still call and text and ask to see her and when i do it all comes back rushing and i start all over again wanting her more needing her more aching for how she made me feel.
I know i should move on but it seems i don't want to i can't i am unable to. i stay away for a while then i keep going back at first it's heaven just hearing her voice or seeing her for a couple of hours and then it is hell the moment we say goodbye.
How do i do it? How do i move on? Can it be done aslan, i feel i am torturing myself it is just torture .